I never would have thought it during the time that the grief was so bleeding raw and crippling. In the days and months after our miscarriage, I felt angry and sad and shocked and despairing. Losing our baby ripped my world apart and it felt like it would never, ever be quite right again. In the years since I've realized that while the grief lessened and the wound healed, the life - and loss - of that baby changed me forever. Losing a baby taught me things that I would never have understood otherwise. Perhaps greater and more important than all of these lessons, though, is this: I don't deserve a baby. No one does.