Sunday, September 21, 2014

His Ways are Always Love


"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
nor are your ways my ways, says the LORD.
As high as the heavens are above the earth,
so high are my ways above your ways
and my thoughts above your thoughts."

It was almost like I was the only one in the church and God was speaking directly and only to me this morning.  

Mary.  You don't know what I am doing.  You don't know where this is going.  You don't know how it will all work out.  
Good.
You don't need to.  Just stop already.  Stop.  Stop doing My job and rest in the fact that it's all part of My big beautiful glorious plan.  A plan that is far beyond anything you can reason, understand, analyze, or wrap that little head around.  It's all love.

I like to know things.  I have a craving to understand a situation and what God may be doing through all of it.  I am the analyzer of analyzers and I find peace and faith in reason and sorting a topic out and mulling it around over and over in my head.  Sometimes, though, when there are no clear answers, when the topic involves the messiness of human relationships or the muck of sin or answers that are higher than the heavens, I get stuck.  There is a temptation to feel like God is holding out on me.  

Lord, if You would just EXPLAIN Yourself, that'd be great and I could go along with it much more easily, You know.

It comes from a good place.  I love Him.  I love His creation.  I am in continuous awe of the way He has designed us and all of creation.  I am fascinated that He knows every atom of every molecule of every cell and that this crazy wonderful universe is so perfectly ordered for life.  I want to know more of the how of His work and even more so the why.  I want to know how this whole humanity thing is going to play out and why that has to be in such a messy messy way.  I love trying to see how He may be working in the intricacies of my life.  He designed us to wonder and reflect and study and know.

It's good to ponder His work. But at a certain point we will get to a point where we just can't understand it.  It's far beyond anything we can grasp at this point.  It takes humility, a humility He is constantly pulling me toward, that recognizes not that there are no answers but there are plenty of answers that are too big for me right now.

Lord, WHY are you doing this?
Lord, this makes no sense.
Lord, how can anything good come from this pain?
Lord, I'm pretty sure it would work much better if You did it THIS way.
Lord, WHERE ARE YOU IN THIS?

One of the things I look forward to in heaven is having all the questions answered and even more so looking back on this crazy journey of earth and seeing the beautiful tapestry that was created with all the threads we understood woven in with all the ones we didn't.  I've been laughed at before for that. Oh, you won't care about all that when you're in heaven.  I disagree.  I think we will better be able to glorify Him when we see how He worked and how at every single intricate moment and in every single intricate detail it was Love at work all the time.  I think we will care about looking back on our story and seeing just how amazing His plan was through all of it, though at the time His ways were so far beyond our understanding.  We are a people with roots, with a story beginning in time but extending into eternity.  I don't think this is all some big charade until the "real" stuff begins. I think this is the real stuff, all part of the story, as high and unfathomable as it might be in the moment.  In the fullness of time I think we will rejoice and be in awe of just how real it all was and how involved our God was in every messy and confusing circumstance so that we could finally reach Him, our Beloved, waiting at the altar.

But until that day when all days are fulfilled, I find peace in surrendering what I do not know.  I will keep on seeking and knowing and reveling in the ways that I see Him work.  But when my mind is too small or my hurt too great, I will choose to have faith in a God whose plans are always for my good and never for my ill, despite how muddled or stinging they may be.  I will choose to trust in the One who has proven His trustworthiness countless times over and I will surrender the unknowing to Him.

He is here.  He is working in that situation that seems irredeemable.  He is bigger than the pain that is bleeding your heart right now.  He knows the confusion and the knots and the drama and the wounds. When all things are made clear we will know again that His ways our not our ways but His ways are always always Love.



{Sunday Scripture Snapshots}




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8 comments:

  1. This was lovely. It reminded me of the portion of Fr. Barron's "Catholicism" on suffering. I remember him talking about how we only have the tiniest glimpse of what's happening to *us* - it's a drop in the ocean that is eternity. Only God *knows.* (Also reminds me of God's response to Job when Job asks, "why?" :) )

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  2. Yes - I am starting to realize this. His ways are always love. There is always peace when we rest in him and trust.

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  3. Thank you for sharing this. I am really struggling right now...bills to pay....and no money to pay them with. Please pray for us.

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    1. Thank you Mary! Today has been a much more hopeful day :)

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  4. His ways are above our ways. Jesus I trust in you.
    I love you Mary; Beautifully said.

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  5. Mary, love it! I'm also an analyzer of all analyzers and need reminding all the time that God is in control and I can't and won't ever know and understand everything.

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